Brand New Day

Today I put on a pair of jeans I haven't worn since before I was pregnant. The first time.

We've been working on it. I'm not sure what prompted my motivation to finally stop pretending that "not fat" = "fit", but two weeks of Christmas at my in-laws' was the final straw. Returning home with a good eight pounds more of Me was not unexpected, given the way food is handled there, but still not thrilling. I determined, with the usual New Year fervor, to quit piddling around and drop the rest of the baby weight, along with the previous fifteen pounds or so that had snuck up on me before I ever got pregnant, if possible.

Well aware that this meant a lifestyle change, not just a hazy intention to eat better, I've been signing up for fitness newsletters, reading motivational blogs. We tried South Beach when we got home after the holidays; I lasted two days. Overnight revolutions do not work on a body still crammed with breastfeeding hormones. So I've been making gradual changes instead.

All our sugary goodies disappeared; I replaced them with fruit. Grains are heavily rationed. The only bread in the house is multigrain pita; I get one slice a day. Cereal for breakfast is a once-a-week treat instead of the default option. I replaced the crackers in my hummus and peanut butter snacks with fruits and veggies. No processed food. No juice (except the fresh-squeezed orange juice from my recently-picked orange stash, although eating the whole orange is better). Throw in some almonds and walnuts if I feel snacky. Lean meat and dairy, in small portions. Several small meals a day instead of three large.

You know, all the stuff "they" keep telling us to do, that somehow seem really, really hard to actually do.

At least they would, if I had done them all at once. But I introduced them gradually, and found to my surprise that it wasn't so difficult after all. As long as I can have fruit, I don't miss bread so much. Although I'm not a raw veggie fan for the most part, I can do surprising things to them with a blender - things that go under the radar of my picky three-year-old along with my old, set-in-their-ways taste buds.

Of course, as we all know, this is only half the equation. For some time now I've been using the fact that I'm not actually OVERweight to justify my activity level, which is pretty much nill. I mean, I don't mind working up a sweat doing lawn work, rearranging furniture, or dancing around the living room, but the thought of slogging away for forty minutes on a treadmill makes me want to shoot myself.

So again, I started gradually. No sixty-minute workouts - just a few stolen moments while the kids were occupied. Twenty lunges on each side (the first time, I could only do fifteen on my left - ouch!) Twenty squats. Thirty seconds in a plank hold. And that was it. But I did them. Every other day. After a week I could hold the plank for forty seconds, and add an extra set to the squats. Lunges still kill me.

Meanwhile, my internet search continued. Anything to stay motivated. Last week I stumbled on an ad for an e-book called The Truth About Abs. It made the usual overhyped claims, but a few things stuck out in the pitch because they were things I was already doing and knew they worked. Things like: Forget the FDA-approved grain-based food pyramid. (Talk about scam. The American food industry is like one big socialized program designed to give us all diabetes. Seriously.)

I googled "truth about abs scam", "truth about abs criticism" - my usual method of researching internet snake oil. I couldn't find any negative reviews. Nothing but glowing testimonials and what looked like honest, unbiased assessments that called it a wealth of good, sound information. So I caved, bought the book, and downloaded it.

Consider this a plug. It is good information. It's mostly stuff I've heard before, here and there. The nutritional stuff is right on the money: whole foods, healthy fats, small portions, limited grains. Avoid high fructose corn syrup and trans fats like the plague they are. (By the by, who knew high fructose corn syrup is in RITZ CRACKERS? Damn you, Ritz! That's what I get for reading labels.) Whole, raw dairy, which I've been curious about for some time and just found a supplier a few miles away. Lean grass-fed beef and free-range eggs - I just found a local co-op that carries these, along with local organic produce at incredibly good prices.

The fitness portion also tickled my ear with good news: no endless hours of treadmill required. The author advocates high-intensity interval training (another thing I'd heard a lot about lately) along with resistance training (weight lifting, essentially). I did my first workout based on his guidelines yesterday - about twenty minutes that kicked my butt with nothing more than a yoga ball and a couple of 8-pound dumbbells. I am a total wimp. But it was something.

The best selling point of the whole program: for one day a week, I get to eat whatever I want, as much as I want. While still avoiding high fructose corn syrup, that is. But hey - a day when I can consume french bread and fettucine in giant portions is a good day, even without the corn syrup, no?

My scale has zigged and zagged in a discouraging fashion, not trending down fast enough to suit me. So this morning I got off of it feeling a little bit snippy.

A feeling that lasted until I put on my jeans. The jeans that, a week after Christmas, would barely button and allow me to breathe at the same time.

They fell off.

I traded them for the next size down.

It IS a brand new day.